My Facebook Time-Out

My Facebook Time Out

Seven weeks without Facebook! There was a time I would have never imagined that possible, but it did happen. I had felt like pressing the pause button on my life given the so many things competing for my attention these days, work, kids, work, patients, work, projects, work, relationships and yes more work! We do live in an age of information overload. Since I couldn't enter a bubble to get away from it all while vehemently rejecting a wooden box 6 feet under, Facebook was one of those which fell victim to my "downsizing".

Since I joined Facebook in....wait while I scroll down my Timeline to confirm.....Nov 22 2007....sorry fb didn't note the exact time (surprisingly), it quickly become a major part of my life. The euphoria that came with linking up with many friends and acquaintances was overwhelming and lingered long. I even got to meet some people who became my "friends" according to Mark Zuckerburg (see my perception on Facebook friends in an earlier blog post, Facebook Friends). It was like being in a big park or in a pub or even in church all at the same time with all your peeps in tow. I got informed and I got entertained. I did my bit of informing and entertaining too. I think I did more than my bit because I was VERY active. It soon became quite common to meet people, some of who I wasn't even friends with on Facebook, and they would say,"Dr Omololu, I saw you on Facebook," or "I always enjoy reading you posts on Facebook" or "how was your trip, I saw the pictures on Facebook."

Yeah, it did seem like I was giving out too much information and I had to adjust my privacy settings which I did. The football group I created, Joe's Soccer Pub, became hidden to hide my soccer madness, and only my friends saw my wall posts, notes and open activities. I still couldn't resist putting up pics of my lovely family and the few ones of me that looked good. Catching up on all the gist and posts from my you all was a stimulant thus Facebook remained a daily activity from the loo in the morning till just before I went to sleep at night. It was always convenient to slip out of the real world into my personal park, pub, church, etc. My "friends" count ballooned to over 1000 making it more tricky to follow all the gist on fb (I have over 200 requests of people I probably know still pending, while I wait for the likes of Chris Aimakhu, Odiri Idike and Deji Oluwole to join so I can add them. I'm also still waiting for Kate Henshaw, Cameron Diaz and Scarlett Johansson to accept my friend requests).  I kept at it though and by the end of last year the brain congestion overload from Facebook and the real world reached the max. I thought of deleting my account but was scared I would lose it forever so I just logged out on all devices. I had deactivated email and other notifications from Facebook since early 2013 but this was a bigger step. Given that Facebook was probably my major source of a social life I was a bit unsure how long I could stay away so I didn't put any time limit to the time out.

Life continued. It was just as much fun and I had more time to do more things. I was able to focus on work better, spend more time with the family and friends physically, read, watch movies....and "Breaking Bad" (on season 4 now), play more squash, go out more and breath better as the din in my head had ebbed. Some crazy people in my blackberry groups sought to recreate the Facebook noise but ended up making music as sweet as Mozart, Chopin and Loose Ends.

I missed Facebook. Seems Facebook missed me too, because after 2 weeks absence I started receiving emails from Facebook trying to tell me what I was missing. It was kinda weird as I felt I was been watched by Mark and his brain eaters. Names of my favorites were clustered into the mails; Ade Olumide, Jagunlabi Okurinmeta, Bayo Ayanleke, Ladipo Soetan, Bala Yakubu, Labi Ogunbase, Ajagzy Omo Ogun, Julia Fortune, Raji Bello, Tokunbo Odubanjo and Dapo Otunla to name a few. I missed my groups; "Hey, Don't Forget To Live", "Old School Music", Joe's Soccer Pub" and "FGCL Ijanikin Earliest Sets", but I resisted the temptation to log on. I didn't feel ready. However I did set a date of return, 25th February, my birthday. I know there would be kind and thoughtful posts on my wall and I have to come and see them to feel good and respond.

My 1st Facebook post read," Not sure i wanted to get involved in this facebook thing but I'm here now so it had better be worth it. Meeting people and becoming friends is one the best gifts God has given us. Life could be a drag sometimes and we need each other to see it through.
Try to make someone smile every day.......you are guaranteed a smile when you do!" Wow, too much of a good thing can be bad, but Facebook has been worth it for me. As much fun as it is, Facebook can be subtly addictive. if you've got the bug like I had there may be a need to withdraw periodically and make some adjustments. Making this recommendation is the main reason for this Note. I'm writing this Note 3 days to the proposed comeback. By the time it goes public (to my friends) I would have been engulfed back into the Facebook world, but with more control from now on, I pray. I'm eagerly anticipating this as it will be nice to be in touch with y'all again.

I hope I can remember my password..........

Confessions of a Michaelmaniac

Our paths first crossed in the late 70s. My first impression was who is this bright eyed black boy with a big afro and a lovely voice who sure can dance? I guess the latter two sentiments were shared by many. He was popularised by his music videos and the first I saw in which that impression was made was “Blame it on the boogie” with his brothers, the Jacksons. To be honest I never noticed his brothers, his aura was just too strong. His brother faded and soon we were watching him dance like a puppet in “Don't stop till you get enough.” By this time I was getting hooked and had some of the early signs of Michaelmania which included always hoping his videos would be played and listening over and over again to the "Off The Wall " cassette. I was then in my 2nd year in secondary school. Befitttingly my first slow dance with a girl up close was to "She's out of my life”. Indeed that particular party ended with all the slow songs on that album and an upsurge of wild sexual hormones!


Then came the much anticipated Thriller album which blew us away (c’mon don’t say you not were not mesmerized). In my dormitory we all clamoured for the tape and I remember a friend Yinka cramming the lyrics of the "girl is mine" on our walkman as he was being challenged in a love duel. Another friend, Yemi Aluko had the rights to the moonwalk on his return from the UK that summer and we all went to meet him to teach us this new dance. The first video "Billie Jean" was an injection of this drug that causes Michaelmania and I took a heavy dose. I remember watching the Thriller video for the first time on LWT (Lagos weekend TV) the first night we had all night television in Nigeria. By the time I watched his landmark performance at Motowns’ 25th anniversary show, I was hooked. I then started manifesting the condition in different ways.

•I drew a picture of Michael on my school bag and made sure everyone saw it as I walked to school.

•I took a picture of Michael with me to class for prep every evening and stuck it on the wall next to my seat.

•I actually wore white socks (thankfully I could not find white gloves)!!

•I once walked around with a sticker of Mike on my cheek!

•I was one of the main attractions at the school dance anytime a Michael song was played.

•I bought every cassette containing MJ songs including the unpublicized “farewell my summer love” album.

•I had 3 life sized posters of MJ on my bedroom wall.

•I actually borrowed my dad’s navy dinner jacket (grossly oversized for me) and stood next to one of those posters ( in which Michael was wearing a similar jacket) and forced my dear bro to take a picture us to make it look as if we were standing together.

•I made a scrap book of MJ in which I wrote his life story, cut out and pasted pictures and wrote the lyrics of all his songs.


Those were the best of times for me as a Michael fan. A light complexioned MJ was on the cover of the “Bad” album and he was no longer the MJ we knew. His music and dancing still moved me seriously but by this time it was obvious to me that chics did not like guys in white socks who grabbed their crotches! I waited patiently for the day the radio station, OGBC played all the tracks on the "Black and White" album when it came out as some of my new friends in University saw what was left of my Michaelmania. By this time I was hooked on the new Jackson 5 called "New Edition" and more seriously on another Michael named Jordan.


Then came the sex scandals and it was getting more difficult to defend the most popular guy in the world whose sexuality was hidden. I guess this sent me into recovery as I never bought the complete “History” album. By the time Michael claimed he was “Invincible” I was exhibiting fewer symptoms of Michaelmania, though my soon to be wife then, wondered why I made “you rock my world”, our song! Seeing him in Madame Tussauds 5 yrs ago was the closest I came to him and gave me quite a thrill.  After the court case 2 yrs ago I thought I was completely healed but when the Thriller 25th anniversary album came out with collaborations with Akon et all I rushed to buy it but was disappointed. I feared for this his proposed tour which will now never be.


He died yesterday and I happened to be watching Sky news when the news broke that he had been taken to hospital. I feared the worst and it happened. I received calls from my siblings and some friends who knew I would be feeling the loss. I am. I remember the time when I rocked with Michael while working day and night, introduced him to my girlfriend which was just my human nature being expressed. I realise I just can’t stop loving him and he was another part of me judging from the way he made me feel. Watching him perform was a Thriller and he did start something in the music industry. It’s a pity he never found a PYT and was one of the lost children. His legacy to us is his music and his charge to heal the world, because indeed we are the world. Michael rocked my world and now he’s seemingly out of my life, although I can’t say he's gone too soon. Say, say, say, what you want to about him but in his own unique way Michael was truly invincible.

FOR THE LOVER OF THE GAME

It often starts with a parent presenting the 8month old boy with a round object which fascinatingly rolls when it is touched. The chase begins and the toddler smiles. He is further bemused by the movement of this object anytime he throws it or kicks it. Withholding it from him can cause tears and tantrums. Even at less than a year old, this passion can bring joy and sadness. Shortly after he starts to talk, he learns to say, “Give me my ball.” So begins the love for the game.

Balls come in different sizes and basically one shape. They are set into motion in various ways; with stringed instruments called rackets, or with firm objects called bats. Sometimes it is with a stick called a cue or simply with your hands or feet. No prize for guessing which is the most popular.

It’s amazing how a man’s life can be ruled by this game. As a kid, all you live for is the break time bell so that you can either go and play or watch a game of football. You buy comics with dreamy stories which you try and project into your own life. I remember wondering where I could get “Thunder” Balogun’s boots so I could be like Billy of the “Billy’s boots” fame! In this era the computer version has taken over for those who don’t know of exercise and spend their youth in front of a screen. At least they are not left out.

If you are lucky you get to enter a stadium to watch a well publicised game. Watching a live game with 40,000 equally football crazy fans like you is not quite the same as watching it on TV. If you are luckier, you get to meet the stars. I met Emmanuel Okala when I was 7 years old and my week was not the same.

Growing up, you form a football team and name it after your location, an animal or your favourite team; Apapa Mountain Lions, Flying Tigers, Tammandu Bombers, Form 2C Devils, and Femo’s Demolition Squad were some of my clubs. On the playing field you adopt the names of the stars and your alias changes as you grow older. I went from Adokie to Zico to Scillachi and finally to Giggs in my non-professional career. The peak of many such careers is at the inter class, inter house, principal’s cup, inter hall or NUGA levels. I got to play for my school in the Principal’s cup with an outing in the FAMOUS Onikan Stadium. My kids will hear of that one time over and over again, then, their children will!!

As time passes, the demands of an academic and professional career set in. You are relegated to the bench and restricted to watching football or retiring to the Sunday 5 a side group. You become a fan of Manchester United or one of the insignificant others. You tithe to World Soccer and Complete Football magazines and soccer websites are listed as favourites on your laptop. You become a soccer analyst from the bus stop to the office, at the club, even at church meetings and to your poor wife who nods in agreement, even if she does not understand or give a damn about what you are saying!! May God bless the wives. A generally quiet guy can become very loud and vocal when football is the topic. You make new friends based on common associations and you dislike some people because of their preferences (for Chelsea)!!

If you are a Nigerian like me, you remember Nigeria 1980, Tunisia 1994 and Atlanta 1996 with a big smile, and you cringe when you hear the name Cameroun. You know how best the national team can play as you argue with those analysts on TV who talk too much, not too mention those sports writers who twist your views with their “stories”. You are the best coach and spending 7.45am – 8.00am with Larry was once your idea of quiet time.

“Football is a spirit”, someone once said, and I think it may have some spiritual inclinations. The legendary Bill Shankly also said, “Football is more serious than a matter of life and death!” I do not agree with him. It is a beautiful game and that’s why it generates such passion. To see the likes of Maradona, Zidane, Okocha, Ronaldinho, Henry and even Barthez do their stuff can stimulate goose pimples (but goose bumps and palpitations in Barthez’s case)! The feeling of exhilaration when your team scores a goal is almost unsurpassed. Ask a hundred million Nigerians how they felt when Kanu scored “that goal”.

I’ve seen poor men arguing in support of increased match allowances in dollars from the National purse for rich over paid footballers. I’ve seen students dipping into their meagre allowances to watch a training session or buy the latest edition of Kick Off. I’ve seen ladies, desperate not to be left out, trying to master the “who is who” and “what is what” in football. The passion soccer generates is indeed spiritual and often of good spirits.

However there is a dark side to the lovely game. Crowd violence, assaults on referees and players, drunken hooligans, racism, poor crowd control with stampedes and gangster supporters clubs, not to mention juju fights and bribery scams all try to give football a bad name. Well, we are on earth and there is good and evil on this planet. Indeed life can be viewed as a serious football game between these two forces. We all know which team we belong in, I hope.

A season ends and another starts. A competition ends and preparations for another one start. Those who make monetary gain from this lovely game have found a way to keep us hooked on it. We really don’t mind, because life is short and contains few pleasures in its routine. As human beings we go about our duties, continue in the struggle and chase whatever our ambitions are. However some of us wait for the weekend or that midweek game so we can sit back, relax and be entertained by the artistry and strategizing involved in the game of football. The anticipation makes us feel good as football is a way of expressing ourselves and our passions.

That is why we love the game.


if you love the game, you can join me and other friends in the facebook group "in the pub.....soccerfans have your say" where we discuss football on this linkhttp://www.facebook.com/inbox/readmessage.php?t=1113325199428&f=1&e=-12#/group.php?gid=49391700954

Travel Notes

TRAVEL NOTES

Travel? Well, it’s not easy to get to travel when you live in a 3rd world country of penury such as this. One has the freedom to travel within the country though, but this has its perils which include roads littered with pot holes, drivers high on pot and vehicles as old as your mother’s first cooking pot!

I have sought to travel out of this country, indeed it was my ultimate ambition once upon a time. Like Dick Whittington and his cat, I hoped to go and pick gold on the streets of London, or America. I didn’t mind silver or bronze in Jamaica, Ireland, Trinidad and Tobago or Fiji Islands either. To watch Michael Jordan play basketball in Chicago or to play soccer for Huddersfield Town were some of my hidden motives.
I prayed to the Almighty, attempted the exams, sought governmental assistance, wrote all the letters and showed up at 3 embassies but was rejected on all these fronts. Anyway Michael Jordan has retired and I’m 30 (which is old in football years), so maybe it’s just as well!

Watching the birds soar freely in the sky often makes me wish I have wings. This gives me an insight into the craze for bonji jumping and sky diving. The latter 2 still look crazy to me, but to pick myself up and fly like an eagle would be simply sublime.

I do get to travel sometimes, so do not think of me as an isolated man within a cell. Thanks to the internet and cable TV, I am transported to continents far and wide. Thus I can watch Manchester United games and I witnessed the turn of the century in Australia live!
Music and books, especially those etched in history trans-locate one to the Pyramids in Egypt, Columbus’s ship, the Bastille prison in Paris, inside Mozart’s head, the courts of Borgia and other far off places.
I tried to tell Romeo that Juliet was not dead, I followed King Richard to war, I merried with Robin Hood, I travelled with Gulliver, I survived the Titanic submersion, I was awed by Nostradamus and I sympathised with Job as he awaited his Redeemer.

In life there are many journeys to make and we can choose where we want to go. Sometimes we get to our destinations and sometimes we don’t even get to pack our bags. We have expectations and anticipate what awaits us at end of our travel. At every point in time, it seems we are always travelling, so maybe we need to stop and ask ourselves where we are headed. 

I did so and sorted out the confusion in my head. I am now embarking on the ultimate journey, fully kitted and running hard with everything I have. Sometimes it’s a tough road and seemingly insurmountable obstacles appear with distractions and disappointments to slow me down. However I get my strength from what awaits me at my destination. The open arms into which I’ll fall make smile as I plunder on. 

Yes, if you’ve guessed right, the major trip for me now is the one which is taking me to heaven. 

p.s
I found this in a yr 2000 diary of mine in a page titled "travel notes." I just had to write something on that page then. 
May we always get to travel and may we always get to our desired destinations.